quote of the day (July 2): on the boats and on the planes!

Day 3 of our tribute to all things USA as we count down to July 4.

Harold Lederman, how do you score it? Well, Jim, through 14 rounds, Drago has connected on 95% of his power punches, an average of 71 per round! Balboa's going to need to go for the knockout in the 15th if he has any chance of winning this fight and then giving a rambling, nonsensical speech that will bring the Politburo to its feet and destroy the Soviet Union. He also should work off his jab more!

Ridiculous Stallone movies aside, on to today's quote:


When you think of songs that pay homage to our great nation, what do you think of first? Oh, the national anthem? That makes sense. What else? Ugh. That brutal Lee Greenwood song? Yeah, I guess I can see that.

Well, how about this: when you think of songs that pay homage to our great nation sung by Neil Diamond in the 1980 version of the film The Jazz Singer co-starring Sir Laurence Olivier, what song comes to mind?

YES! "America"!

In addition to being one of the QOTD bureau's go-to karaoke songs, it's also a reminder of the USA's traditionally open arms to immigrants from all over the world who came here to make a new life for themselves and their families.

Neil spoke about his specific inspiration for this song on VH1's Storytellers (Saturday Night Live sketch):

Neil Diamond (Will Ferrell): "This next song, you all might like. Few people know that I am fueled creatively by my massive hatred of immigrants. [plays intro to "America"] Gary and I have gone on for hours about how much we hate foreigners. Right, Gary?"

Gary, the Bass Player (John Goodman): "Leave me out of this, man."

Neil Diamond: "NO, I WILL LEAVE YOU IN!! Well, my love of this great and beautiful nation, and my hatred of all people with dark skin led me to write this. [sings] On the boats and on the trains. They're coming to America. Never looking back again. Just do the best you can!"

The band members start telling him to shut up, Neil screams at them.

Neil Diamond (Will Ferrell): "I'll smack you in the mouth, I'm Neil Diamond!"

This seems unrelated, but it's not. Watch till the end for a nice little Neil Diamond impersonation.

Sonic Death Rabbit (or, a Mustached Man-About Town)

Day 17. The mustache is coming on strong. Still blond directly above the lip, but if you're looking at me from 10 paces, I'm definitely a guy with a mustache.

So does a Mustachioed Man with a heart of gold spend his Sunday evenings? Going to see the Charlotte Roller Girls, of course. It was their first Charlotte bout, and it was definitely a lot of fun. With player names like Sonic Death Rabbit, Pollyannarchy and The Debilitator, how can you go wrong? It was definitely a lot of fun - I highly recommend going next time they play. It was also a perfect place for me and my mustache to blend into a crowd--for the first time since I've started growing, no one even gave me a second glance.

Never one to rest on my laurels, my boy Mike (the Wispy Tickler) and I headed straight from the Roller Derby to see Rambo.

SPOILER ALERT: Rambo, despite being approximately 73 years old, can still operate a bow & arrow. And he also spends 10 minutes operating a giant gun that turns all the evil Burmese soldiers into ground beef. It was undoubtedly the worst movie I've seen in the theatre since Ben Affleck in "Daredevil". On the upside, it was only about 65 minutes long. And it was pretty unintentionally funny. I thought maybe I'd enjoy watching Rambo now that I'm the sort of guy who proudly wears a raggedy mustache.

I was wrong.


Rambo vs. the Charlotte Roller Girls: I'd rather face Rambo - he's more likely to break his hip.



FUNDRAISING UPDATE: Only 11 days left of the growing season. We're closing in on $15,000 raised so far. If you haven't donated yet, please visit our Mustaches for Kids' donation page! More posts and pictures soon.